


The Fall of An Angel

by Ollieollieupandfree



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Apocaletsnot, Crowley loves Aziraphale (Good Omens), Crowley's Fall, Fallen Angels, Gen, Hurt Crowley, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), M/M, Ten years after the Apocaletsnot, The Apocalypse that Wasn't
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-01-05
Packaged: 2019-10-05 01:18:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17315357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ollieollieupandfree/pseuds/Ollieollieupandfree
Summary: Ten years after Apocaletsnot, Adam invites Crowley, Aziraphale, and the other former Them to catch up and for a small party. But when Wensleydale asks a question, the Them and Aziraphale get a story that they've never heard before.





	The Fall of An Angel

**Author's Note:**

> Hnnnnnng, I didn't want to do angst, but this idea wouldn't leave me alone.
> 
> As always, feel free to contact me through Tumblr @the-skeleton-in-the-potc-ride

Crowley had never expected to be contacted by Adam Young after the end of Apocaletsnot. Although he had been hiding behind the power of the antichrist from other demons for years, he didn't actually think Adam would contact him again, nor did Aziraphale.

"Should we go?" Aziraphale asked, looking at the letter Adam had sent. (Crowley was rather confused as to why Adam had sent a letter as opposed to just called them, since the antichrist was in posession of Crowley's number).

"I think we should," Crowley said, leaning against Aziraphale. "He just wants to catch up. I think it should be fine."

Aziraphale nodded. "All right. I suppose it should be. . . fun."

 

* * *

 

 

The party was. . . going okay. Mostly just talking about the Them's studies and how they'd been doing in school. Aziraphale was rather proud of Adam's grades in his religious studies course, and just as proud of how the other Them were doing.

"Sorry, I have to ask," Crowley said to Pepper, Brian, and Wensleydale. "Why do you all remember us? I thought Adam wiped your memories?"

"I gave them their memories back," Adam said, nodding. "I felt bad. Figured that everyone should get to remember that day, not just me."

"Can I ask a question now?" Wensleydale asked, leaning towards Crowley.

"I suppose so," Crowley said, leaning away from Wensleydale and looking at Aziraphale curiously.

"How did you fall?" Wensleydale asked.

Crowley froze, his glasses slipping down his nose. That was. . . not the question that he had expected to be asked. Crowley looked at Aziraphale, panicked. Aziraphale looked just as confused as Crowley, and as curious as Wensleydale. Crowley cringed, realizing that he had never actually told Aziraphale how he had fallen.

"Hey," Adam said, punching Wensleydale's shoulder. "That's rude, Wen! Crowley doesn't have to tell you."

"No, no, it's fine," Crowley said, setting his sunglasses on Adam's coffee table and rubbing his temples. He took a deep breath and began the story;

 

* * *

 

 

 

"I was always different from the other angels, and demons for that matter. I had what He called an imagination. Now, all angels and demons have imagination to an extent. But only what He allowed them to have. But I was different. Nobody was quite sure why I had an imagination to rival His precious human's, not even Him.

I didn't Fall in the First Fall. It's hard to describe, but the First Fallen weren't demons. They were just. . . fallen angels. I always thought it was odd, that they weren't proper demons. Even back then. I was so curious that I ended up not even helping to rebuild. I sat outside The Garden, and I wondered. I wondered why The Bright One had fallen, when those that had wondered before him did not. I wondered why The Bright One's followers had Fallen, instead of being forgiven. He had always said that He was the center of all forgiveness. And yet. . . those that followed The Bright One - even ones that didn't do it willingly - had Fallen. 

I wondered what made the humans so special to Him that He would cast His favorite son down farther than anyone had before? What made the humans so different from us, that He was willing to lose so many of His First Borns simply because The Bright One insulted His precious Second Borns?

I sat outside The Garden for years, I think. Although time was always odd for me, I don't quite remember how long. But I sat there for long enough that the other First Borns came. They begged me to help, pleaded with me to share what had my light so dim. I couldn't answer them. After a certain time, I had forgotten how to speak. I think that's why I couldn't answer them. That or He wouldn't allow me to.

Finally, it came to the point that He came to me. He asked me why I didn't help my siblings rebuild. He asked why I sat there, thinking. And I told him.

'Why do they have free will, Father?' I had asked. 'Why were we not granted this? Why was The Bright One banished for wishing that he was free? Father, why did you not have mercy on his followers? Father, why do you love the Second Borns more than us?'

He froze. He stared at me, angrily. And then he struck me.

 

* * *

 

 

Pepper gasped. "You mean he made you fall?"

Crowley shook his head, taking off his suit jacket and carefully freeing his wings. Even now, the bones were broken and twisted. Feathers were missing and patches of the skin twisted and morphed around sharp outcrops of bone.

 

* * *

 

 

"He grabbed my wings, and He broke them. I'm not sure why, I can't even imagine why He would punish me like this, though I can guess that it was for my insolence to question His decision. I lay on the ground before The Garden for days. Nobody came to help me. Nobody thought to help me. Though they watched, though they observed my pain as I cried, they didn't help. Not until The Bright One came.

He knelt before me, and gently took my wings. I remember crying. I remember screaming for our Father's mercy. I remember promises to do better, to be better. And then I stopped. The Bright One had raised my head and smiled at me. He was beautiful, and his touch was gentle as he healed my wings to the best of his ability. He looked at me like I was the most precious thing he'd ever seen. He looked at me like I was beautiful.

'Would you like to be different?' he had asked, cupping my face. 'Would you like to be different so that He can never hurt you again?' I don't quite remember what I said exactly, but I know that I agreed. Before I could think about my decision, my body was sleek and scaly in his hands. The Bright One gently lead me to the Western Gate of Eden and let me in."

 

* * *

 

"You didn't fall," Adam said, watching Crowley curiously as the Last of the Fallen put his wings away. "Not really. You were lead down."

"You were saved," Pepper said, nudging Adam gently.

Crowley hissed a sharp laugh. "Yeah. That's what I thought. But I was as expendable to The Bright One as I was to Him. Lilith and I, we were the first demons. We were by The Bright One's side for millennia. And then Lilith was locked away, and I was sent to Earth; never to be recalled to The Bright One's side."

Aziraphale leaned forward and pressed his lips to Crowley's. It wasn't a kiss, merely the offered comfort of the angel's warmth. Their lips and foreheads pressed together innocently, Crowley could feel the love that Aziraphale had for him. Love that surpassed The Bright One's, and even His. Crowley closed his eyes as Adam's hand gently laid itself on his shoulder. Memories of his fall seemed to soften like faded polaroids as new wings sprouted from his back. He looked at Adam, for once glad that he had fallen; if only to achieve this moment of absolute humanity and love.

**Author's Note:**

> WOW Y'ALL CAN TELL HOW LAZY I GOT AT THE END, CAN'T YOU?  
> As is obvious, The Bright One is Crowley's name for Lucifer and the capital-h-He mentioned is G/d. So. . . I'm Jewish. So I know shit all about angels and Hell and all that part of it all. So bare with me.


End file.
